Naughty Fingers Upsets Uncle John’s Band
Posted at 12:40 a.m. on Aug. 10, 2012
(Patrick Curran/CQ Roll Call)
As any seasoned sports bettor knows, records don’t always tell a team’s whole story.
That reality was thrown into stark relief in the Congressional Softball League on Thursday night, as the 71st-ranked Naughty Fingers walloped 15th-ranked Uncle John’s Band, 18-8, on the National Mall.
A group of college friends, the Naughty Fingers are listed on the CSL website as 0-3 on the season — hardly an intimidating mark. But according to captain A.J. Board, the Fingers simply never get around to reporting game results and in fact haven’t lost since Roll Call last covered the team in early June.
“What you saw today was more along the lines of our normal game than what you saw last time,” Board said, referring to his team’s lopsided loss at the hands of Alphabet Soup.
Uncle John’s Band, in contrast, held an impressive 8-2 record coming into the game. A generations-old team composed of former Hill staffers, the Band was missing a few key fielders but hoped to come out strong regardless.
They never got a chance. The Naughty Fingers came out firing to the tune of 12 runs in the first three innings and quickly took a commanding eight-run lead.
With storm clouds looming ominously over the Mall — never breaking, thankfully — Uncle John’s Band sharpened its fielding and held its opponents to only a couple of runs each inning for the remainder of the game. But neither the improved defense nor the inspirational Animal House references shouted from the dugout (“Did we quit when the Germans bombed Pearl Harbor!?!”) could dig the home team out of its hole.
“They got hot with the bats,” Uncle John’s captain Chris Rackens said. “We were playing good defense, but we just couldn’t get the outs.”
Sean “Hollywood” Johnsen went 4-for-4 with three doubles and a triple to lead the Naughty Fingers in the on-paper upset.