Stoney’s Claims King of the Hill Title

(Courtesy Matthew Windsor)

House Softball League Commissioner Anthony Reed’s DGS squad earned the title in the HSL in the team’s 14th and final season but came up short in the King of the Hill Game against Senate Softball League champs Stoney’s, losing 15-7 on Thursday night.

Stoney’s took an early lead, scoring seven of their 15 runs in the first inning, and never relinquished it.

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The Season That Wouldn’t End

(Patrick Curran/CQ Roll Call)

After four months of play and three weeks of rain-shortened playoffs, the Congressional Softball League was supposed to finally crown a champion this past Saturday.

Instead, we’re in for one more week of waiting. Full story

Roll Call Softball Awards: HSL Regular Season

In honor of the what’s essentially the last day of the House Softball League’s season (the Big Lebowskis play two isolated games in September, but most teams are done as of today), Roll Call Softball is here to hand out awards for the 2012 HSL season.* The accolades are based on the games we were able to cover — an admittedly small sample — but we’d like to think our awards are deserved regardless.

Without further ado, the honorees! Full story

CSL Finals Schedule Released; HSL Bracket Coming Friday

The Congressional Softball League kicked off a big news week in the D.C. softball scene by releasing the bracket and game schedule for its 2012 finals round Wednesday.

The 16 teams that survived group play will compete in a single-elimination tournament Sept. 8, the winner of which will hold the title of CSL champion until next year. Full story

Day Two of CSL Playoffs Cut Short by Rain

Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose — and sometimes you get rained out.

The old maxim rang true for teams slated to play on Saturday, the second day of the Congressional Softball League’s tournament, as steady rain canceled all games from 3:15 p.m. onward.

Still, the action did feature a major upset, a few highlight-reel plays and the first glimpse of the league’s best team, the undefeated Injured Reserves.

Your correspondent couldn’t make the early games in the North Group, but thankfully didn’t miss any big upsets. The No. 11 All Vols and No. 13 Baltimore Oracles both went undefeated in group play, besting Pew’s Your Daddy, the Service Nationals and the SIGTARP Watchdogs for the group’s two bracket bids. The tightest match was the All Vols’ 7-5 victory over the Service Nationals, in which the Vols clinched a berth.

Recaps on the South and East groups after the jump.

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CSL Tourney Recap: Day One

The Congressional Softball League is essentially the “Whose Line Is It Anyway?” of the sporting world during the regular season — the rules are made up, and the points don’t matter.

But that’s not true when the playoffs roll around.

The CSL’s annual postseason tournament kicked off on a beautiful Saturday at Beulah Fields in Alexandria, Va. The strictly enforced one-hour time limit, called balls and strikes and full-sized diamond made this a decidedly different experience from the average Mall game. Thankfully, the conditions were (nearly) perfect for a day jam-packed with softball — your correspondent has the sunburn to prove it — and the CSL’s sluggers did not disappoint.

Red Group

The day kicked off at 9:15 a.m., when the Brookland Sluggers upset the Peace Corps Villagers in a competitive four-inning affair. It didn’t feature the big hits or diving catches of some of the day’s later games, but it was perhaps the most entertaining, because of a muddy infield that caused most batters to wipe out spectacularly coming out of the box.

On another amusing note, iced coffee replaced beer as the drink of choice in both dugouts. Either there’s a line even CSLers won’t cross, or everyone was simply hungover already (it was a Saturday morning, after all).

As the morning progressed, two clear favorites emerged in the six-team Red Group: The GSPM PoliTricks and the Fallen Angels. The PoliTricks, armed with a potent top-to-bottom lineup and all-star fielding, dispatched two opponents in quick succession by invoking the mercy rule (a 10-run gap after four innings means the game is over). The Angels, meanwhile, were one of only two teams on the day to record a 20-0 victory.

The favorites ended up taking the group’s two berths by going 2-0 each, but that didn’t mean the rest of the day wasn’t worth watching. The aforementioned Sluggers-Villagers game was highly entertaining, and the late-morning matchup between Read the Fine Print and Booze, Win or Lose featured enough fantastic catches to fill your average SportsCenter highlight reel.

Ultimately, the biggest takeaway from the Red Group is that the Fallen Angels and especially the PoliTricks — neither of which your correspondent saw before Saturday — will be serious contenders in September’s bracket round.

White Group

The White Group’s Saturday slate was disrupted by a couple of teams canceling at the last minute, but the early afternoon still brought some excitement to Beulah Fields. The second-ranked Microsoft Bada Bings took the field for two consecutive dominant performances, laying the groundwork for what could be a long playoff run.

It wasn’t a total cakewalk, though: Microsoft got an early scare from upset-minded Hudson Institute in the White Group opener. Hudson played impressive defense against a slugger-filled lineup and even managed to take a brief lead in the third inning. Then the Bada Bings woke up, knocked two balls out of the park and promptly took an 11-run lead.

The Bings cruised in their next game, a 20-run shutout of 33rd-ranked Big League Chu, and predictably sealed a bracket berth. Big League Chu quickly rebounded to pull out an epic comeback win over Hudson Institute, but the DOT Triskelions spoiled the rally by taking the group’s other bid on two forfeit wins.

The Rest

Your correspondent couldn’t stick around to watch the smaller Blue and Gray Groups play in the evening games. But we’ve got results anyway, and there was no shortage of excitement.

The No. 41 Fearless LEADers used a 7-5 upset win over No. 8 Agent Orange to secure the bid from the Blue Group, in which they were the third-best of four teams based on regular season ranking (though they did win 11 games, as good or better than most teams in the league).

The Gray Group featured three teams with nine-win resumes, so it wasn’t a huge surprise when the 17th-ranked Hank’s Hitters took home the bracket berth. The surprise came when Senate candidate Hank the Cat apparently showed up to cheer on his team. For those of you who haven’t been following Virginia politics this election season, Hank is a cat from Virginia running for one of the state’s Senate seats. Really.

That’s all for this week, folks. Tune in to @CQRCSoftball next Saturday for live updates from the second day of CSL tournament group play.

No Happy Ending for Brockschmidt, Whiskey Caucus

(Patrick Curran/CQ Roll Call)

Sometimes, pure adrenaline can lift an average team over a far superior one — particularly at the end of the season. But most of the time, not even an emotional high can make up for pure talent on the diamond.

The latter was the case Wednesday night on the National Mall, as I Hit That Last Year (11-3) soundly defeated Whiskey Caucus (7-11), 26-16, in a late-season battle of mixed House Softball League teams.

I Hit That Last Year, coming in ranked No. 22 in the league and armed with two former college baseball players, didn’t waste any time showing off its guns. The favorites knocked home seven runs in the top of the first, and it looked like a blowout before Whiskey Caucus, a bipartisan team with a compelling history, even stepped to the plate. Full story

Cap City Flyers Use Defensive Prowess in Victory

(Aaron Guerrero/CQ Roll Call)

In a low-scoring game on Tuesday night, the Cap City Flyers chose stingy defense over hard slugging offense as their weapon of choice in defeating the Big Lebowskis 7-4.

Billed as the House Softball League’s “Game of the Week,” the matchup pitted two top-five teams against each other.

The Lebowskis, whose founding came via George Washington University Law School, reaffirmed their reputation as a high-octane offense team with a three-run homer in the first inning.

Hailing from the Federal Aviation Administration, the Flyers quickly answered with back-to-back homers in the same inning. Full story

VP Candidates’ Team Pulls Out Big Win

(Patrick Curran/CQ Roll Call)

Holy vice presidential candidates, Batman!

The Swing State Sluggers (3-1) held off a late rally from the Badlands Bombers (0-5) to notch a 21-16 win as the National Mall fell dark on Thursday night.

The Sluggers represent the offices of GOP Sens. Marco Rubio (Fla.) and Rob Portman (Ohio), both of whom are considered favorites to run alongside Mitt Romney in the 2012 presidential election. But neither the hype over Romney’s choice nor the release of Christopher Nolan’s “The Dark Knight Rises” could distract the Sluggers tonight.

The Republican juggernaut fell in a 5-0 hole early on because of an assault on right field by the Bombers, made up of staffers from the office of Sen. Tim Johnson (D-S.D.). The Sluggers fired right back in the next inning, though, taking the lead on a grand slam and carrying a 9-5 advantage into the third. Full story

Tribe Holds Off Green Monsters

(Patrick Curran/CQ Roll Call)

Need a metaphor for the Green Monsters’ 14-6 loss to the Tribe on Thursday night? Just look at their beloved Boston Red Sox.

The Sox started the season a dismal 4-10; the Senate Softball League squad of Sen. John Kerry (D-Mass.) couldn’t catch a break either, giving up nine runs during the first two innings to the Tribe, which represents the American Israel Public Affairs Committee.

But like their American League East counterparts, the Monsters weren’t dead yet. Impressive fielding — most notably from centerfielder and captain Jeremy Hunt — helped Kerry’s squad hold their AIPAC counterparts scoreless during the next four innings. By the top of the seventh, the Tribe’s lead had slimmed  to four runs. Full story

Trash Talk Lifts Tequila Mockingbirds Over Plan B

(Patrick Curran/CQ Roll Call)

Many athletes practice the trade of trash talking, but few have truly mastered it. One of them was present on the National Mall tonight.

Inspired by the incessant heckling of right fielder Holger Kuessner, the Tequila Mockingbirds (6-2) withstood a late rally from Plan B (1-5) to post a 14-13 House Softball League victory tonight.

“We have our secret weapon — we call him ‘German Steel,’” Mockingbirds captain Stephen Peranich said of Kuessner. “He keeps it light on the sideline. He’s talking smack the whole game. You need someone who … keeps you focused on having fun.” Full story

Government Lawyers Shake Off Heat for Big Win

The only thing hotter than the D.C. air Wednesday night was the Branch’s bats.

The Branch, representing the Department of Justice, Civil Division, Federal Programs Branch, turned in a 22-9 thrashing of Federal Circuit Court of Appeals’ Persons of Ordinary Skill in independent softball action on the National Mall.

With temperatures lingering in the high 90s in the early evening, it would have been easy to understand most softball teams calling off their regularly scheduled programming. Instead, the Mall was even more crowded than usual: With tents from the Smithsonian Folklife Festival taking up valuable field space, three games were cramped into a stretch of lawn that barely holds two under normal circumstances.

The result was a high-scoring contest in which tight fielding played a key role. Full story

Rounding the Bases

Here’s a quick recap of what we learned this week out on the diamond and from behind our laptops:

• The Women’s Congressional Softball Game, which pits Members against the press, is on June 20, a mere 5 days away. Tickets for the event are $10 and can be purchased here. Indeed, for only $10  you can donate to a great charity, the Young Survival Coalition, and watch, with the possibility of meeting, some of the biggest names in Washington D.C. Not too shabby a deal.
• A routine House Softball League game between the Hired Guns and the Mastodons took on a Jerry Springer-like twist Tuesday night. The game was cut short after three innings. The exact circumstances remain unclear, but this much it true: it involved cops, a high school janitor and a dented pickup truck. We’re still scratching our heads.
• While some teams need the sound of silence to concentrate on their fielding and hitting duties, the Cap City Brewing Flyers buck tradition by cranking up the jams not only during the pre-game, but in-game. For pre-game, the team  keeps the Pandora dial on an indie rock station that features the sounds of bands half of us have never heard of. When the game gets under way, they turn to the more clubby sounds of Maroon 5 and Rihanna to pump up both their mental state and their bats.
• The MisHits may have the most random team composition: former aides to Rep. Loretta Sanchez (D-Calif.) and the Canadian Embassy. Must be some kind of committee connection.

Rounding the Bases

Here’s a quick recap of what we learned this week out on the diamond and from behind our laptops.

• This time last week the Bada Bings went live on Twitter. After we made note of it, the team openly worried that receiving press on our blog could prove to be the softball equivalent of the Madden curse or Sports Illustrated jinx. The fears proved groundless, as the team romped over  the National Geographic Vampire Bats 20-5. The team ends the week exactly where it started: sitting solo atop the Congressional Softball League standings (6-0).
• It was an open question whether the Colorado Cutthroats would be as bold on Twitter following a loss as they had been after a win. To their credit, they went public after a defeat this week, though they seemed to lay the blame on the air. Or something.
• Despite some on-again, off-again rain, the showers didn’t hit the ground when it counted most: during game time.
• Some teams were fortunate enough to catch the come-back bug (we’re talking to you, Never Say Di), while others couldn’t quite muster the offense to mount a charge (our regrets, 1st F’n Amendments).
• Deep Space Nine may have suffered a shellacking on the field. But at least it did so in style. (Nice shirts!)

Colorado Cutthroats Show No Mercy

The Colorado Cutthroats lived up to their pre-game smack talk Thursday night, taking it to the EditOrioles, CQ Roll Call’s softball team, 23-7.

We had noted earlier this week that the Cuttthroats had been in absentia from the land of Twitter, only to return with some hard-hitting dialogue about what they had in store for their opponents. Full story